Posted by Gunther on 01/23/2017

On may 16, 2014.. I woke up, at age 45 ( just turned- my birthday was April) put on my favorite suit to go to work. I thought I was in the best shape of my life, altho under quite a bit of stress. At 2:20 pm- I remember clutching my chest (my hear. Felt like it was out of control and spinning). I remember telling my coworker that "oh my god this can't be good" - next thing I remember was days later waking up in ICU of a cardiac specialty hospital. By the grace of god I worked in a hospital- a smaller community one- and dropped right in front of the respiratory office. 50 feet from the emergency room. It took 4 attempts at DEFIBRILLATING me. The doctor said if that happened even in the parking lot o would not have survived. I went back to work far too soon, as I work right in the same area it happened- plus my face required 17 stitches to piece my lips back together as well as knocking out my front teeth. At first I felt so lucky- like I was invincible!!!! Then slowly the intense and extreme anxiety came. I'm afraid to drive now. Afraid to be in a store alone... and afraid to be back to work... every time I have a heart flutter I'm convinced it will happen again. The only thing they can attribute this to was a low potassium. I'm in therapy but it's so difficult to convive myself that it won't happen again .. anyone else become so fearful and anxiety ridden?


I identify so solidly with your story. Maybe low potassium for me, too. My SCA happened the morning of Christmas Eve of 2016. I'm 49 & small business owner (so yes to stress)....never a health problem or hospitalization, no chronic conditions, no heart disease, blood pressure normal to minimally low....after 21 days in the hospital (first 6 days on a vent)....I left with a defribilator installed along my ribcage. I too, have been focused on physical recovery and it has been miraculous (as every doctor proclaims with gusto!). I'm doing some mild exercise and starting to resume activities.
Almost 9 weeks later, I'm starting to feel a little unglued. A few days ago, I erupted in tears in the shower imagining the original event--which I still don't remember. I felt little twinges of chest pain today in the center of my chest and an IV spot on my hand felt painful (like a needle that wasn't actually there was being pressed upon)----this was all new to me and was slightly alarming....I hadn't thought about returning to the hospital in this context (emergency) and I felt dread about the possibility. I've spent the day checking in with myself to alternately ignore and then worry.
I'm so blessed that two family members knew CPR and started immediately. The physiacian team was so thorough with my care. I feel like I'm not doing my part if I can't keep it together.